An emotional return

(Photo by Gregory Shamus/Getty Images)

I cannot even begin to fathom what the loss of a child feels like. The pain must seem insurmountable, never-ending. The grief must overwhelm your soul. The support of family, friends and teammates is helpful, but it doesn’t seem like enough because they don’t understand

And to go even beyond that, how can a person return to his job and pitch just days after that loss? Pat Neshek of the Oakland A’s did that.

The A’s found a way to show their support for Neshek and his family, to remind him that they were there for him during his time of grief. It was a patch to go on the jersey of every player in the organization embroidered with the letters GJN for Gehrig John Neshek.

Neshek headed to Detroit for the first game of the American League Division Series and when it came time for him to pitch, he made it look easy: a groundout and a strikeout. It kept the game close, but it was what happened after that meant more.

He walked off the mound, looked to the sky and tapped his arm where the patch resides. It was clear that he was close to tears, the breaths he took appeared to be an attempt to hold back, but fans would have understood if he lost it. I was emotional watching it. The moment he appeared in the bullpen, I knew this was going to be tough stuff.

To Neshek, this wasn’t just another day on the job. It was all about the son he would not be able to play catch with, to watch grow up. It was about making sure his son knew that he would be missed and baseball would provide Neshek with the chance to heal.